I had my first class on Monday morning, and when it let out early I found a park bench to sit on and study while I waited for my sister to get out of her first class (mine was Family Studies and hers was Stats, so I think we know who got the better deal). In the shadow of an old, elegantly-bricked building, with my notes spread across my lap, I was happy to be back in school ... and that kind of surprised me.
Every semester when classes start again, I have a bad habit of looking at it as an opportunity to fail, like this is the year I'm going to drop the ball and miss assignments and blank on the exam ... like this is the term I'm not going to be able to keep my schedule together, and get all the readings done, and actually write the term paper due at the beginning of December. But, you know, it's usually fine, and by the end of the year after final exams, maybe there were a couple of marks I wasn't totally happy with, but I made it.
So I'm hoping that this will be the year that I just learn to relax a little bit (!!!) and stop overthinking things, and maybe expect for once that things will go well. I like to prepare for the worst (which isn't always a bad thing!) but often with me becomes being terrified of the worst and refusing to believe that the best is even possible. And that's not such a great place to be.
Here's to setting kinder expectations and upholding the highest of hopes ... and here's to the knowledge that it's just school, after all, and we can so do this.
what are your biggest school fears? biggest school dreams? what hopes are you holding onto this fall?