flowers and ferris wheels // change

//flowers on the dining room table//

Does anyone else feel like everything is

suddenly changing?

like the drop in your stomach

when the ferris wheel

begins a downward cycle

even if you'd rather stay at the top,

pulled forward and back towards earth

even though you can 

see the sun better

from up high.

everything is ending,

school draws to a close,

thinning and narrowing

in the single-minded plunge towards

EXAMS

that one word ominous like a judge's gavel

but even heavier this year

this last year.

Does anyone else feel like now

we're different people than we were?

we've known we weren't children anymore

been trying to believe it for a 

long, long time

but today it feels real, like you've outgrown your own skin

and you look at yourself

and wonder what to do now

these hands that are totally, completely your own
now reaching forward to grasp a future
that you aren't sure you want to hold
just yet
the far-away decisions press ever closer
and
these hands

look very, very small.

Does anyone else feel lost?
but also excited, like
you never even knew there was this much world
to get lost in, and
it's time to go exploring?
like, yeah these hands are small
but there's a lot of room between them
and my heart is wide, wide open.
just watch.
I do not feel ready to tackle
this great big world
but I know

I am.

so-o, growing up is...weird? anyone else, or am I totally crazy? ☺ tell me what fun and scary / exciting new things are happening to you this summer!

xx
Olivia